Podcast: Denying Mermaids, Cee-Lo’s Cock…atoo, Lonesome George Isn’t Lonesome Any More


Rest In Peace, Lonesome George, may your journey be devoid of pesky tortoise chicks, full of god-fearing merpeople, and sprinkled with mangled feathers. Don’t worry because Chris’ friend’s obese cat will meet you in Animal Heaven shortly.

Sounds like a sadcast, but trust me it’s not.

 

 

Have an animal anecdote or shout out? Let us know and we will do it hard on the next codpast, people.

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Podcast: Robbie on Romney, Shatner’s Gorilla Bad Touch, and Future Zoos, OF THE FUTURE!


Animal News: The Podcast is ready to go.  Are you?

Thanks to guest correspondent Robbie!

This is Koko signing either shame or pink. We'll let you decide.

NEWS: Chances Are, Pets Are Fat and Not ‘Fluffy’


As a surprise to absolutely no one, the Association for Pet Obesity Prevention (APOP) recently found that (along with Americans themselves, it seems) American pets are getting fatter. Somehow, pet owners accept that pets as a whole are getting fatter but can’t really admit it when it comes to their own.

"No, I don't think your cat super glued a fat suit onto itself"

When 22% of dog owners and 15% of cat owners were asked about their pet’s weight, they thought nothing of it when really the animals were obese or overweight. If you don’t believe me, check out this intervention style reality show, Project Pet Slim Down, and the choice moments when the owners find out just how morbidly obese their animals are.

"Hey! It's not like I'm force feeding her the Big Macs"

How could this have happened? Fortunately, APOP and some other sources have lent us some perspective in this matter:

Pig’s Ears are 182 calories an ear

Milkbones range from 10 to 225 calories depending on the size.

An egg, an apple and a slice of bacon  are each around 80 calories.

Pretty meh for people. But for a 10 pound animal whose daily intake should be about 220 calories? It’s a very big deal. But Kristin! A Snausage or Beggin Strip is only 30 calories. Yes, and potato chips are only 11 calories each! How many pets are really just getting one treat a day? (Put your hand down, mom. I know the truth.)

It's as if they were literally raining down from Kitty Heaven.

Damn. This is serious. As funny as those obese doggy and kitty photos are, I really can’t make light of this grave situation.

However, since the study did not cover other pets, I will post other obese pets here presumably to teach everyone a valuable lesson about weight management.

         

See, it's funny cause I mixed up the two of them.

In Memorium: Harvey Dent, Cat, 2012-2012


Harvey Dent – 2012-2012

We Hardly Knew Ye, Harvey.

This week, we are sad to report that Harvey Dent, cat, is dead.  Harvey was taken from us far too young, and we wish him well on his way.

Harvey was born to his mother, a cat, and showed signs of being a cat most of his life.  When he was born, he had four legs, four eyes, two noses, two mouths and two distinct faces.  His mother, being a fan of comic books, and irony, named him Harvey Dent.

Over Harvey’s short life, he rose through the ranks as, first, an Internal Affairs Lawyer, moving up to the Attorney General of the greater Gotham City area.  Tragically, he was severely burned and lost half of his face, and some say, half his mind.  As a cat, he enjoyed his mothers milk.  He was known also by his less loved nickname, Two Face, tragically applied before he literally had two faces.  Which was always, because he was a cat, that was born with two faces.

Mr. Dent will be missed.  He was known for his two faces, but he was so much more.  He was called an abomination, and, because he was black, was discriminated against as a cat.  He brought good luck to his friends, and bad luck to those whose path he crossed, unless they turned around three times and spat over their shoulder, or were Batman.

Rest in Peace, Harvey.

See, it's funny cause I mixed up the two of them.

Harvey, finally captured by Catwoman, struggles.