In the last podcast, I anti plugged slutty toy horses. I mistakenly linked the horses I had in mind, Struts, with Bratz.
Please forgive me listeners. The Bratz line has its own line of strangely flirtacious fashion horses called Ponyz.
The Struts are actually produced by the My Little Pony people which means they don’t really have the excuse of an older line of, um, suggestively dressed teen dolls. No, they had to justify Struts (Sluts + Strumpets? Oh wait it’s cause horses strut. Wait, really?) as filling a demand young girls everywhere have for horses and fashion.
I know my background in marketing might have some influence here but my solution to What is Horse + Fashion never equals this:
Most of the horse “accessories” or horsessories don’t bother me too much – I pray that their owners know that trying to put pearls, skirts, anklets and earrings on horses is a death wish- the shoes, however, are killing me.
Long time listeners know how much I hate dog shoes but at least those serve the discernible purpose of keeping paws clean. The heels these horses are sporting, which my mom would identify as “hooker heels,” are kind of the worst thing you could do to torture a horse.
Thankfully, I feel like these abominations have been exposed for the strange, unwholesomeness that they are and My Little Pony decided to move on to the now beloved, precocious, cherubic Friendship is Magic Ponies.
And no one ever heard from those flirty, smizing ponies in miniskirts ever again.