Tuesday Video Lunch: Theory of Evolution Simplified

For this week’s Video Lunch, we are going back to school. I grew up near Dover, PA. If you’ve heard of this sleepy little town, it is most likely because of the lawsuit Kitzmiller v. Dover Area School District. The short version is: school board includes intelligent design (alongside evolution)  in the curriculum, ACLU sues claiming that teaching ID violates the establishment clause, tax payers are ordered to pay over a million dollars.

I wanted to talk about the specifics of the case and the arguments for and against including ID in school curricula, but that $1,000,000+ bill just overwhelms me. Keep in mind, that is just what they paid to the plaintiffs and their attorneys; that doesn’t include the substantial bills for their own counsel. Everybody involved should have had enough sense to not take this so far. How could either side justify bankrupting the school district over this issue? Everybody would have been better off (especially the children) if they replaced all the science requirements with episodes of South Park.

South Park even teaches evolution:

PODCAST: Flea Circus Genocide, Momterruption, and We’re Back (vaguely)

Your favorite podcast is back, with more swearing, more genocide and more tapping upon the abdomen of your mate to find the reproductive organs to dunk your webbed ball of sperm inside. You’ll get it when you hear the cast.

Also, if anyone has heard from Brendan Johnston, it seems that he may have died in the middle of this comment. “You guys havent stopped the podcast have”. If you have any news, please write us at thisisnotarealemailaddress.forrealitsnot@notreal.com. Thanks.

Tuesday Video Lunch: Dangerous Additives to Breast Meat

For this week’s Video Lunch, we bring you a python that keeps Kosher.

A while ago, Israeli model Orit Fox did a photo shoot with a python. Things took a dramatic turn when the snake decided that he’d had enough of that shit and tried to take a bite out of Fox’s oversized chest. According to some outlets, the snake died of silicone poisoning. Frankly, I don’t believe that part. But the snake totally did bite her on the boob and we have video to prove it. Enjoy!

Podcast: Closer to the Rhino, Closer to the Skin, and Closer to Chimp Porn

We’re getting our ribs crushed by Rhinos, making pubic lice extinct, watching porn with chimps, python challenge update, and of course, an anti-plug, don’t do it.

This is so late, because Matt is a boner.

Tuesday Video Lunch: Something Out of Matt’s Dreams

We all know that vultures eat rotting carcasses, but we at Animal News get to chow down on Video Lunch!

According to Himilayan Raptor Rescue, Asian vultures are going extinct. As is often the case, humans are to blame. This time, however, people are killing the vultures with kindness. That is, kindness for other animals.

Sick and dying livestock are given a drug called “Diclofenac” that acts as an anti-inflammatory and painkiller. It is very effective at easing the pain of ailing farm animals. Unfortunately, it is also quite toxic to vultures. Raptor Rescue claims that vulture populations “have declined by a staggering 99.9% in the last 15 years,” primarily due to this drug.

Vultures are not pretty. In fact, most people find them downright revolting. But they are an essential part of the ecosystem. Without them, rotting carcasses would pile up, creating a serious disease threat and also feeding a growing population of feral dogs.

So what can you do to help protect the Asian vultures? You could donate to Himalayan Raptor Rescue. But if you were feeling more adventurous, you could go parahawking.

Parahawking is the act of paragliding with birds of prey. Raptors are experts at using thermal vents for lift, so they can be used to guide paragliders into the right air streams. And the best part is that the Parahawking company donates a portion of their profits to vulture conservation. Actually, the best part is probably that the hawks will land on your hand while you are paragliding. But conservation is a close second.

Tuesday Video Lunch: Run Free (Lunch)!

For this week’s Video Lunch, we bring you a cute little rodent with a side of “oh no!” This video has been floating around the internet and even became popular enough that The Mail Online did an article about it.

I don’t have anything more to say about it except that it could be viewed as an allegory for the perils of freedom and an illustration of the similarities between love and hate.

“If you love it, set it free. If you hate it and want to see it eaten by a hawk, also set it free.”

Podcast: Aquarium Heists, Tupac the Guard Caiman, and Cat Interrogations

You know what time it is?  It’s time for ANTP.  Today, we’ve got animals guarding things, animals being stolen, and an animal breaking into jail.  Listen!

Also, we just hit 25,000 views on wordpress.  Thank you all so much for reading, and we hope to get another 25,000!

True Facts About The Seahorse

Like me, you probably need more reasons to judge animals on features and skills over which they have no control. Especially the seahorse.

We’ve spent so much time on the lowly pandas and squirrels, that we’ve hardly touched on this hopelessly inefficient swimmer what with its “Denny’s menu” of  dorsal fin. Where we, ANTP, has failed, Ze Frank provides you with a thoughtful video with scoop on nature’s most romantic predator.

Check out some True Facts About The Sloth, Baby Echidna and  Angler Fish. Thanks to io9 for keeping me hip to the latest in snarky animal videos.

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WTF Evolution is Pretty Awesome

Man, Jake just suggested a site today, so I decided to suggest another one.  WTF Evolution is pretty funny, and good stuff.  Check it out!

“So I was thinking.”

“Great, evolution.”

“Nobody really needs eyeballs and limbs and all that, right? When you get down to it, all you really needto be alive is an opening for stuff to go in and an opening for stuff to come out.”

“Well, yeah, I guess so.”

“I might try making things that way for a few million years. ‘Sea cucumbers’ and the like.”

“Okay, but it’s not just going to be, like, a tube with a mouth and an anus, is it? That sounds a little crass.”

“What if I made it pink?”

“I don’t know…”

“Oh, and also, it’s going to breathe through the butt end.”

- WTF Evolution

Fly into the En-Dangered Zone!

Stop doing whatever you are doing (looking at cat pictures) and get yourself over to Bird and Moon. Bird and Moon has some very funny and informative animal comics. Like this one.

Every last shred of credit goes to birdandmoon.com. Except the En-Dangered Zone bit, that was me.

EDIT: Fixed the link so now you can see the rest of Bird and Moon’s great stuff.